Ok, we’re back (see lesson 1 here). Last time we got you going on getting your business going. We ended with naming our test chocolate humor business Sinfl Snickerz.
The next step is coming up with a slogan. A slogan is a saying that your sales people can use to pump themselves up when things get tough and ugly teenagers throw french fries and mostly-full Mountain Dew cans at their heads while they are minding there own business, knocking on doors to sell exceptionally high quality window cleaning.
You can’t use “Just do it” or “I’m lovin’ it” because they are already taken, so think of something besides those. How about “Chocolate: giving sad older single women something to come home to everynight.” Too long. What about “Eat it. Work it. LOVE IT!” I like that. It makes you feel like you’re climbing the corporate ladder, breaking glass ceilings, and having the time of your life doing it.
Step 5 is getting a logo:
If you want people to take you seriously you MUST have a serious, well-designed logo. You can use Microsoft Word’s design program called “Clip Art” that is under “Insert,” then under “Picture.” It has some good things in it.
Step 6 is the dreaded P word; PRODUCT! “But Christian, it’s HARD to come up with a product!” I know it is, but think about it, if you want your business to stick like “PROfessional” “DUCT” tape, you need a “PRODUCT”.
So, what is Sinfl Snickerz product? Well, we already decided that the product is chocolate humor bumper stickers. So to come up with a bumper sticker, you need to do what we in business call a “Brainstorm.” To do a Brainstorm you need to write down the first few random things that pop into your mind and see if they can fit together to make a good bumper sticker. Ok, here goes:
1. Mako, 2. Bull shark, 3. Great White. Hmm, I can’t make anything of those. Try again.
- Hasselhoff, 2. Germany, 3. Puppies. Still not getting the right combination. Ok.
1. Jeff, 2. Stole my dibs girlfriend in Jr. High, 3. Looked like Megan Fox. Ok, this isn’t working because I’m thinking of related things. That’s how the human brain works because of neurons . Let’s try a new approach. Look at the newspaper to see what’s in the headlines. Ok, I’m looking at mine now and I see an article about Charles Darwin. We could do one like “I discovered the missing link; it’s called a Chocpanzee, and I ate it!” Or something science-y like that, to appeal to the growing CSI/Jeopardy crowd.
Or here’s an article in my paper about gay marriage. Ok a chocolate joke about gay marriage. Hmm. Try to be sensitive here because you don’t want to be sued on your first day of business. How about “I don’t have an opinion on the controversial and nuanced topic of gay marriage because I am too busy EATING MY DELICIOUS AND RICH MILK CHOCOLATE!” Ok, that one’s funny but it’s too wordy. But I do like the all caps ending because chocolate humor is usually funniest when it’s done in an in your face way. Round two: “Forget about gay marriage, I want to know when I can marry my CHOCOLATE!”
That might be a winner.
End of Lesson 2.